Tuesday, July 4

Happy 4th of July Jim,

They’re starting to set off fireworks. I’m curious to see how loud it gets. There weren’t as many booths selling firecrackers this year and I didn’t see a lot of customers at them.

Do you remember the 4th of July that you came to Sacto and we were at the bike trail on the river near Cal Expo? There was a crescent moon over Venus. You mentioned The Star of the Sea. Then you said that nobody notices something as beautiful as that, but they can’t wait for all the silly fireworks. We agreed how superficial Americans are.

I was thinking about the poster you had in your apartment to celebrate the bi-centennial. There were four guys on it. I know Thomas Paine was one of them. Washington too. I can’t remember the others.

The country is as superficial as when you died, but there is a lot less freedom. There are cameras everywhere. Everybody is afraid. The more cameras there are the more afraid people are.

This evening I walked around a couple of blocks of government buildings. There were nice flowers and bushes, and picnic tables for the staff to eat in the shade. A lot of the places were tucked away.

But I didn’t want to linger and smell the flowers, or make plans to bring a book for three hours on a Sunday to enjoy the solitude. I was afraid.

I didn’t want to be asked to leave. It feels weird knowing somebody is watching me. I said happy 4th of July to a couple of people, but I only said it to bring myself up and to make them feel good.

I wish America was great and there was something to celebrate. We Americans are terrified of each other. Land of the free and home of the brave my ass.

Several years ago I heard a decorated veteran give a patriotic speech. It was great. One of the things he said was that people do not take God seriously anymore.

I could not stay for the end so I asked somebody at the pamphlet table for his name and address. I wrote to him.

I agreed we are Godless. Then I commented on what he said about war and patriotism. I said there are security guards and cameras all over town. I said all a woman has to do is pick up the phone and say a man raped me. She is taken at her word and the man is destroyed. I said I worry about being arrested all the time and I feel more unfree every day.

He didn’t write back.

One time one of our nephews told me that he called ‘grandpa’ on Memorial Day to thank him for fighting in World War II. Dad appreciated it. I would like to thank dad and all the soldiers for keeping America free, but we live in a police state.

I wonder how many vets cry when they realize we’re being spied on all the time and you can’t even have a beer and a cigarette in the park.

The firecrackers have been steady, but it has not been dramatic.

Well Jim. Thanks for listening.

Love,

Dave

Monday, July 3

Dear Jim,

I talked with dad this afternoon. He is stifled. He was in love with one of the other residents, but she had to move. He won’t be able to see her again.

It shocked me when he told me. It’s incredible. 95 years old and he is in love.

It hurts to listen to him. He says, “This too will pass.” I told him, “Yeah. But it doesn’t make it hurt less.” He appreciated that.

Hearing dad talk about love makes me embarrassed that I haven’t been in love in so long. It scares me.

There was a woman here a few years ago I liked, but I thought she was married. I always saw a guy her age leave what I always thought was her apartment. When I talked with her a couple of days before she moved, I realized she was single. I said to myself, “Oh no!” She looked at me as if to say, “You dumb shit.”

I tell myself to count my blessings, but that doesn’t make me less lonely. However, it does keep me from complaining. I want to complain less as I get older.

That’s a great thing about dad. He doesn’t complain. I remember when I tried dating through newspapers in 1990. Several of the women had ads that said they didn’t want the strong silent type. I was offended because dad is the strong silent type, and I try to be.

Women think because a man doesn’t say much, he isn’t in touch with his feelings. Dad’s very much in touch with his feelings. He used to tell me, “Always be honest with yourself.” Did he say that to you?

Dad has always counted his blessings. He often talks about how much he loved mom and what a great marriage they had, and how lucky he was to have her.

We were lucky having dad, and seeing the great marriage he and mom had.

I know you agree.

Take care,

Dave

Sunday July 2

Dear Jim,

It’s been a long time since I have written to you. I have never gotten over you. I haven’t been able to fill the void you left.

Today I went to Capitol Park to observe a rally to impeach the president. There was only 160 people. It was the same old progressive bullshit: pro gay, pro unwed mother, the evil corporations, the wonderful non-western religions, the victims of white oppression.

Not a word about responsible parenting, how much unwed mothers cost the country, how there is nothing for boys and men to do except get fucked up and wander around.

It was a nice day. While I was sitting on the lawn, a young guy came up to me and handed me a flyer. We talked a few minutes.

He explained to me some of the things the rebellious young democrats are working on. They are trying to make the Dems the party of the people. I hope it happens.

It was nice to talk to a man. I ache so much to talk to men. Earlier in the rally I talked with a guy my age. He was wearing a marijuana baseball cap and a marijuana T-shirt. He showed me his ID for the marijuana dispensary.

He wants marijuana to be legalized. He told me a pollster said that most of the people who smoke dope are 65. Isn’t that incredible? My generation!

What was good about you is you hated the drug scene. It amazes me that so many people our age smoked dope every day until they were 40.

Which brings me to the impeachable president. He is the third boomer president and the third boomer president to be a teenager.

Slick Willie got a blow job from a 22 year old. Bush dressed as a pilot to pretend he was a warrior as he walked onto an aircraft carrier. This idiot constantly makes inappropriate remarks. At 70 he still wants to “Let it all hang out man.”

Well, that’s it for now Jim.

I will write later.

Love,

Dave

Thank you

Thank you to visitors and viewers for reading David’s poems about Sacramento. The poems can be viewed by clicking ‘David’s postings’, or by going to the sidebar calendar to click a date between December 1, 2019 and January 15, 2020.

Romance for a New Age

Caballero dismounts from red scooter bike.
Takes guitar off his back.
Stands under 100 year old tree,
Looking up to 90 year old bedroom.
Singing.
Celebrating passionately his everlasting love.

Upper X

I wonder if slobs ever leave the dankness of their concrete jungle,
Walk down the street.
Stand in the sun watching cars on the freeway,
Palms in the landscape.
Wishing they had somewhere to go,
Could sleep under a tree,
Lie in weeds.
If they do, I never see them.
I’m lucky to be a dreamer,
A block and a half from Paradise,
A few steps from my darkness.

Didn’t answer the question

Asked an 80 year old –
Were there more bums when you were a kid than homeless today?
He said in those days they wanted food not money.
They’d rake leaves for a sandwich.
They weren’t aggressive.
They knew their place.
My mom never felt threatened,
Was never afraid.

Great place to die

Old timers in Midtown.
On their death bed.
Beg to be put outside.
Under the trees.
To make peace with the life they led.

Customer is King

Walked a homeless woman to a gas station.
Carried some of her crap.
She needed to pee.
Bought some cigarettes,
But they made her leave.

The Oasis

Lush and sunny after the storm,
Winn Park was empty.
Stunned me.
I felt free.
The park was mine,
But I chose not to sit.
I was afraid I’d corrupt it.